A First Time for Everything

Dan’s existence is defined by his fears and reservations. He fears rejection, pain, heartache, and embarrassment because each of these are things he experienced in middle school and never overcame. Dan’s memoir opens with a scene of him making a speech in front of the whole school, which leads to a moment of total embarrassment for him. Flashbacks throughout the memoir illustrate other incidents that influenced his perception of himself and the world, including being rejected by a girl he likes, being told he isn’t a good illustrator, and falling off the rope in gym class. Dan writes that fear “starts in the crotch” and works its way to the extremities of the body (21), which is why so many people pee when they’re afraid. He’s grateful that that never happens to him since it would only add to the embarrassment he often feels.

Dan dreads the school trip because he fears being on his own, being in a new place, or being around people he doesn’t know. In Paris, Dan fears going out on his own without any adults but does so anyway and finds that the reward is well worth having to fight through his fear.