Nostalgia is a powerful force in Belly’s decision-making. Her life has been so shaped by her experiences at Cousins Beach that she feels acutely adrift after Susannah’s death and the loss of her lifelong routines. This affects the way she navigates relationships and her decision to be with Jeremiah despite her longtime love for Conrad.
Cousins Beach is a nostalgic place for Belly because it is the setting where she has done most of her growing up. After Susannah dies, suddenly all Belly has are memories of her, with no opportunity to make new ones. Belly admits that her nostalgia and love of Cousins often clouds her ability to inhabit her life away from Cousins: “I’d only been back at the summer house for a couple of days, and just like always, I’d already forgotten about Taylor and everything back home. What mattered to me was here. It had always been that way” (249). This increases Belly’s intense longing for the past and her desire to remain attached to Cousins and the Fisher brothers no matter its ramifications for her life back home.
In the wake of Susannah’s death, Cousins becomes even more awash in nostalgic meaning for Belly, as it becomes synonymous with the lost mother figure of Susannah: “Predictably, I cried as we drove away [.
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By Jenny Han