Squeeze Me

The Potussies are deeply immersed in planning their attire and presentation for the Commander’s Ball. They intend to sing an original song called “Big Unimpeachable You” as a special tribute. Gossip is circulating within the group regarding the First Lady’s affair with a Secret Service agent. Everyone assumes it has ended because Mockingbird has spread enough disinformation to confuse the tattletales.

Crosby has his hands full, keeping party crashers off the grounds for days before the event. The Cornbright brothers are found entering through a tunnel. Ryskamp is called in to identify them. He would prefer to kick them out since Kiki’s membership in Casa Bellicosa doesn’t extend to her children, but Crosby allows them to stay, feeling he has little choice: “Tragically, keeping his job depended on sucking up to the Kiki Pew Fitzsimmonses and Fay Alex Riptoads of the island. Special Agent Ryskamp clearly had no such obligations” (265).

Mockingbird pays a visit to Mastodon to discuss the gown she will wear on Saturday evening. She asks if his “nutritionist” will be attending the gala. This is the euphemism they use for POTUS’s mistress. They also talk about the python threat, but the President refuses to take it seriously.