The Weight of Our Sky

“I know the signs; this is the Djinn, unfolding himself, stretching out, pricking me gently with his clawed fingers. See what I can do? He whispers, unfurling yet another death scene in all its technicolor glory. See what happens when you disobey? They float to the top of my consciousness unbidden at the most random times and set off a chain reaction throughout my entire body: cold sweat, damp palms, racing heart, nausea, light-headedness, the sensation of a thousand needles pricking me from head to toe.”

This passage outlines the way the novel reinterprets Mel’s feelings of anxiety and compulsion as a malicious spirit. Critically, the spirit cannot force her to act, instead controlling her thoughts and telling her to obey her intrusive thoughts. This understanding of mental health issues is not uncommon, as mental health struggles are often personified as a living, separate entity. However, in the context of the novel, the perception that Mel’s struggle is a religious one hinders her options for relief.

“Most people grow out of it, this belief in magic, this reliance on little wonders, and I did too. But then Abah died, and in the echoing space he left behind inside me, the Djinn rushed in, making himself comfortable, latching onto those old familiar cues. He started off slowly: If you tap your toothbrush against the sink three times before you brush, if you take exactly twelve steps to get from your bed to the kitchen, if you flick the light switch on and off six times before bed, then Mama stays well and happy and healthy.”

Two crucial pieces of information are revealed in this passage, as Mel notes that the Djinn appeared after her father’s death, marking that event as the trigger for her broader obsession with her mother’s wellbeing. Second, the instructions the Djinn provides are framed as a transaction in which Mel performs the counting, tapping, or stepping in exchange for her mother’s safety, appeasing the Djinn, who, seemingly, can hurt her mother. This transactional nature sets up Mel’s mental health struggle as a form of extortion, explaining her intense panic and anxiety when she is unable to complete the needed tasks.