Trainspotting

“That’s what ah am, a coffin-dodger, and ma reflexes are not getting any better…but it’s all here, all within ma sweaty grasp. Syringe, needle, spoon, candle, lighter, packet ay powder. It’s all okay, it’s all beautiful.”

This gives a painful insight into Mark’s keen awareness that heroin will kill him eventually. The power of addiction makes it seemingly impossible to quit, however. As long as he’s high, everything is fine.

“Ah take some more crass humiliation for what seems like an eternity. Ah get through it nae bother though. Ah love nothing (except junk), ah hate nothing (except forces that prevent me getting any) and ah fear nothing (except not scoring).”

Again, these brief lines speak to the “in the moment” mentality of the junky and the power of addiction. The indignities that the characters put themselves through in their pursuit of drugs are framed with some humor throughout the book. Take, for example, Mark sifting through his own feces to recover (and subsequently reinsert) the opioid suppository in Chapter 3. However, strip away the comedy, and the circumstances have dire implications.

“He puts a hand oan the deid bairn’s cauld cheek. Tears are fillin in his eyes. […] One mystery has been solved. Wee Dawn’s face looks so obviously like ma mate Simon Williamson’s.”

This quote is from Mark, describing the scene following baby Dawn’s cot death in Chapter 7. It’s a telling moment that sums up multiple themes. We see death in person, ironically taking the life of an innocent child instead of one of the many junkies who tempt the Grim Reaper every day with their dangerous habits. We see the themes of family—biological versus a social/friend family—collide, as the junkies recognize the small junky family that could have been: Simon, Lesley, and Dawn. That Mark refers to Simon not as “Sick Boy” but as “Simon Williamson” speaks to the magnitude of the moment.