When I Grow Up I Want to Be a List of Further Possibilities

“When I Grow Up I Want to Be a List of Further Possibilities” (2017) was written by the contemporary Chinese American poet Chen Chen and published in his debut collection of the same name. The poem lists all of the things the speaker, presumably Chen himself, aspires to be: a good friend, son, and partner. The poem examines the nuances of Chen’s intersectional identity, exposing how race, gender, and sexuality alter each of his personal relationships.

The majority of Chen’s poetry is thematically concerned with identity politics. His poems are quick-witted and sharp, unpacking past traumas to arrive at new and surprising conclusions. The influence of poets such as Allen Ginsberg, Franny Choi, and Monica Sok are apparent within much of Chen’s work. His poems are conversational like Ginsberg’s and inquisitive like Choi’s and Sok’s, daring to confront both personal and universal struggles on the page. Chen’s work makes readers acutely aware of their humanity through his own vulnerable, poetic revelations. Chen’s work is simultaneously compassionate and biting, making it stand out within the contemporary poetic cannon.

Poet Biography

Chinese American poet Chen Chen was born in Xiamen, China on 9 March 1989. He grew up in Massachusetts after immigrating to the United States with his parents. Chen’s poetry is interested in the Asian American identity as it relates to the biological family, the found family, and Queer identity. Chen’s work is predominantly autobiographical, examining his own personal experiences as a gay Chinese American man.  

Chen received his bachelor of arts from Hampshire College (2011), a liberal arts school in Amherst, Massachusetts, and went on to earn his master of fine arts from Syracuse University (2014), where he was a University Fellow. Chen holds a PhD in English and Creative Writing from Texas Tech University.

Chen is the author of four chapbooks, or small collections of poetry, entitled: Set the Garden on Fire (2015), Kissing the Sphinx (2016), You MUST Use the Word Smoothie (2019), and GESUNDHEIT! (written collaboratively with Sam Herschel

Wein, 2019). Chen’s debut full-length collection of poetry, When I Grow Up I Want to Be a List of Further Possibilities (2017), was longlisted for the National Book Award, and went on to receive many honors such as the A. Poulin, Jr. Poetry Prize, the GLCA New Writers Award, the Texas Book Award for Poetry, and the Thom Gunn Award for Gay Poetry. Chen’s second full-length collection of poetry is Your Emergency Contact Has Experienced an Emergency (2022).

Chen’s writing is conversational in tone. His poetry juxtaposes playfully humorous lines against the disciplined structures of the work itself, creating a dynamic and all together unique reading experience. Chen favors repetition, whether that be within the sonic features of a poem or the anaphora of a particular word or phrase (see: Literary Devices “Anaphora”). Much of Chen’s work is concerned with the current moment, cutting through the harsh truths of his own lived experience with humor and hope.

Chen lives in Waltham, Massachusetts with his partner, Jeff Gilbert, and their pug dog, Rupert Giles.

Poem Text

Chen, Chen. “When I Grow Up I Want to Be a List of Further Possibilities.” 2017. Poetry Foundation.

Summary

“When I Grow Up I Want to Be a List of Further Possibilities” details the poet’s process of self-discovery. Chen examines each individual part of his identity across the poem’s 15 stanzas, listing the ways in which he aspires to be a good friend, son, nephew, brother, and partner for the people in his life.

Chen’s poem examines how Chen’s construction of self is disrupted by the outside opinions and expectations of others. Chen grapples with being a gay Chinese American man, attempting to define what that means to himself based solely on the thoughts and feelings of those around him. However, by the poem’s end, Chen turns inward, seeking self-validation instead of looking for it externally.

The through line of “When I Grow Up I Want to Be a List of Further Possibilities” is human connection, emphasizing that good relationships with others are only sustainable when one has a good relationship with oneself.