You've Reached Sam

“Sam drops his head, chuckling to himself. ‘What’s so funny?’ I ask, slightly annoyed, as he takes my hand. He plucks the cherry blossom from my wrist, and begins unfolding it. I start to protest, but fall silent when it’s just a sheet of paper in his hands. Inside is a note with Sam’s name and number. ‘I never thought to open it…’ I say. ‘I guess that’s my fault.’ We both laugh at this. Then my smile fades. ‘What’s wrong?’ Sam asks. ‘It’s ruined now.’ The paper is torn and wet from the mist. ‘Don’t worry,’ Sam says. ‘I can make you another one. I can make you a thousand more.’”

Julie and Sam’s connection and romance are highlighted in this flashback. The dialogue shows that they both care for each other, as well as highlights repeated emotions in Julie’s guilt over breaking the paper flower and Sam promising he can make her more. Julie often feels guilty in the book, and Sam often makes her kind promises. Irony sets in because readers already know Sam doesn’t live to make her any more paper flowers.

“‘Remember the concert, that night I got my guitar signed? We ended up at the café, too, isn’t that right? We shared one of those half-moon cookies…you know with the white icing? The ones you said don’t look like moons at all? Re­member that?’ [Sam asks]. Of course I remember. The memory is fresh in my head, sending a flutter to my stomach. I was wearing his denim jacket, the one I threw out this morning. We were soaking wet from the rain. Exactly like I am right now. My heart is pounding. Why is he bringing these things up again? These memories. I don’t think I can hear any more of them.”

The theme of Flashbacks and Memory appears early on through Sam using the term “remember” repeatedly with Julie, as if he’s trying to pull her into the past. His mood changes later when he wants Julie to move on with her life. At first, both need time to process his death and to feel uplifted by their past pleasant memories.

“‘That’s the surprise,’ Sam says with a laugh. ‘I went back and got the other piece for you. I let you think it was gone. That way, it would be more special when you finally get to put them together. When the wings are complete. It’s pretty romantic, right?’ Except I don’t have the other wing anymore. Because I threw it out, and now the two pieces will never be reunited. I can’t believe I ruined his gift. I ruined everything. ‘I was expecting a big reaction,’ Sam says, noticing my silence. ‘Did I do something wrong?’ ‘No, you didn’t, it’s only, I—’ I swallow hard. ‘I don’t have the other piece anymore, Sam.’ ‘Did you lose it?’ I clench his bookend. ‘No…I threw it out.’ ‘What do you mean?’ ‘I threw everything out,’ I tell him. ‘All of your stuff. I couldn’t look at it anymore. I was trying to forget you. I’m so sorry, Sam. [...] I know, I’m terrible. I’m sorry.’”

The symbolic bookends, which can never be reunited just like Sam and Julie, connect to the theme of Coping With Grief: Accepting the Unplanned and Julie’s regret. She feels terrible over trying to forget Sam, leaving her with a solo bookend. Their dialogue shows their compassion for each other and Julie regretting her decision.